58,400 Times - This Time a Gift

Last night my amazing, accomplished, and lifelong learning friend Deb smiled with deep understanding and joy when I shared a recent experience.  Hence, today's post.

After a wonderful weekend with Callie in Chicago (enjoying a Jackson Browne concert, dinner at Sullivan's and the Peanuts Exhibit), combined with laughter, food, and fun with Sean and Yana in Chesterton, IN, and conversations live or text with Shannon, Kasey and Molly, by Sunday evening I was back to empty nesting. 

Making a simple, no-carb, delicious meal of roasted asparagus and brussels sprouts with homemade vinaigrette and mayonnaise respectively, I headed down the familiar flight of seven stairs with my dinner plate, the remote, and the Sunday NY Times.  It was time for 60 Minutes. 

Quick calculations suggest that I have been up and down these steps 58,400 times equaling 306,600 steps on this stairwell alone - one of five in the house.  The thing is, this time on the way down a thought streamed into my head and heart that halted and exulted: 

I have nothing that needs to be done right now except what I am choosing to do.  To use today's language... Seriously?  A mental checklist appeared fiercely competing with "nothing that needs to be done."  For the first time in decades (nearly three in fact) "nothing" won out.  Go me.

Those last three steps leading to the couch were lighter and filled with a keen awareness of joy and gratitude for my kids, my home, health, career and more.  I placed my meal, the paper, and the remote just as I wanted and didn't even gripe when football ran long, delaying 60 Minutes.  It didn't matter.  Time was my own tonight.  TIME WAS MINE.  Amazing.

A few days later I was with my neighbor, a mother of two ages 12 and 5.  She was lamenting the lack of time in her life and feeling overwhelmed.  Trying to help but quickly realizing it would not, I shared this story.  She looked right at me and said, "Never gonna happen."  I know that feeling.  Gratitude again.

Gratitude galore that the kids and I have made it to this amazing age and stage in life.